Another Series of Alphabetical Limericks, #10, J is for Jehovah

“Well, dammit!” spake Lord God Jehovah,

“I’m commanding a new supernova!

The sun’s larger girth

Will make charcoal of earth,

And I’ll start the while blasted thing ovah.”

Another Series of Alphabetical Limericks, #9, I is for Iguana

Aunt Isabel happened upon a

Iguana while taking her sauna.

Though dampened by steam

Her terrified scream

Will echo from then til mañana.

Another Series of Alphabetical Limericks, #8, H is for Harrumph

When I left off this blog a year and a half ago I was partway through a series of limericks highlighting the letters of the alphabet.  Today's offering is the long-delayed continuation of this project, picking up at the letter H.

Home, Sweet, Home: a Unhappy Victorian Household Scene

“Harrumph!" said the headmaster's wife,
"Enough of this Latin school life!
Your afternoon tea
Will be without me” -
And she threw down her toast and her knife.

"Heu heu!” her husband replied
As he heard these harsh words from his bride.

And at tea time, alone,
He munched on a scone -
Then opened his Horace and sighed.

Another Series of Alphabetical Limericks, #7, "G is for Genesis"

In Genesis, In the Beginning,
Before there was Knowledge or Sinning,
There wasn't a weed in
The Garden if Eden,
And you couldn't play games without winning.

Another Series of Alphabetical Limericks, #6, "F is for Facebook"

On Facebook we post odds and ends,
And hope they'll be read by our "friends".
And amazing to say,
It's on this simple play
That the Zuckerberg fortune depends.

Another Series of Alphabetical Limericks, #5 "E is for Easter Egg"

There's an Easter egg hunt in July.
Perhaps you were wondering why.
The sensible reason
It's held out of season
Is to save on the cost of the dye.

Another Series of Alphabetical Limericks, #4 "D is for Deconstruction"

Upon "Upon Julia's Clothes"

A doctoral student named Derrick,
In a dense deconstruction of Herrick,
Defines the attraction
Of silk liquefaction
As dangerous, dark and barbaric.